By Lee & Jessica, Owners of DiskretAdultLife, September 27th, 2018
If you feel uncomfortable, nervous, and yet very excited about how to have anal sex; you’ll fit right in! Most women are nervous to discus anal sex with friends, much less try it in the bedroom. Its that dark mysterious fantasy we all want to try at least once. But there is a right way to go about it, and a wrong way. Let us explain both ways and break things down in a simple, easy to follow, step-by-step process. Let’s bring anal sex out of that dark mysterious corner and face it head on.
This article will explain everything you need to know about how to have anal sex. We will explain the pitfalls most women go down, and how to have the best anal sex experience possible. Anal sex is not for everyone, but it is something you should investigate and try if you feel confident enough. Anal sex should only be done after the proper precautions have been taken to avoid any risk of discomfort or injury.
Who Has Anal Sex & Why?
Anal sex, often gets a bad reputation of gross, taboo, and not natural. But if you want to know how to have anal sex, the first step is knowing this is complete B.S. Anal sex is 100% completely natural, and all types of people have been engaging in it since the dawn of time. When I say dawn of time, I mean it. The ancient Greeks were famous for partaking in anal sex. How’s that for a history lesson? So don’t be worried about trying it, just understand it’s not weird or gross.
Why Should Men Have Anal Sex:
Remember anal sex is not always penetrative sex from a penis into another men. Obviously gay men have anal sex and enjoy it a great deal this way, but straight men are enjoying anal sex too, just in a different form. Straight men enjoy anal sex toys penetrating their anus either while masturbating or from a women partner using a sex toy on them. So if you’re a man and want to know how to have anal sex, first you should understand the anatomy.
The prostate is a gland near the bladder that produces prostate fluid, one of the main elements of semen. It is located in front of the rectum and can be easily stimulated through anal sex in the form of a sex toy, finger, or penis. It’s an amazing feeling to have the prostate stimulated, and you can even have a prostate induced orgasm. A P-spot orgasm is said to be 33% more intense than a normal male orgasm.
Why Should Women have Anal Sex:
Just like the men, if you’re a woman and wondering how to have anal sex, or why you should have anal sex. You should understand the anatomy behind your body first. Just because you have a vagina doesn’t mean anal play doesn’t bring pleasure.
Many women love anal sex, a prostate is not a requirement! The anus is full of nerve endings, the same way a clitoris is. These bring massive amounts of pleasure when stimulated on the outside and inside! Many women describe the feeling of anal sex as a “fullness” that can’t be achieved in the vagina. The vagina stretches and conforms to a large degree while the anus is tight. This can give a unique and pleasurable sexual experience.
How to Have Anal Sex 101:
The single most important thing about how to have anal sex is communication! You should never have anal sex if you don’t want too, but when you feel you are ready communication with your partner is key. So how do you break it to my partner you want to try anal sex?!
Asking for anal play can be a bit scary, no matter who you are. But in a healthy relationship you should be able to talk openly about whatever it is you are feeling. Only immature partners will laugh or think you are gross. Explain to them you are looking at branching out your sexual experiences and looking to share that with them.
If you decided to take the next steps together by engaging in anal play. Remember communication is extremely important here too. Not only for “faster/slower/left/right” to receive more pleasure the way you want it. But also, for any discomfort that might occur. It’s important for your partner to know and stop if you feel any pain.
Start with Anal Play:
Anyone who wants to know how to have anal sex needs to start with the basics. It is important to start small with anal play and work your way up to anal sex. This will not only be easier for you and your partner to advance sexually together but will be the most comfortable and natural way.
Finger His or Her Anus
Anal play can start with something as basic as using your finger to put slight pressure on his or her anus while enjoying penetrative sex. That can then lead into slowly slipping the finger into his or her anus. Keep in mind you must lube your finger or his anus first! The anus does not produce a natural lube like the vagina. To avoid discomfort and possible tearing you must use lots of lube. We highly suggest starting with a natural water-based lube. It will wash off easy and not stain the sheets or clothes. It also is safe to use with most quality anal sex toys.
After fingering his or her anus, they will start to get used to the anal play. Now if you are looking to know how to have anal sex, the next step in the process would be anal sex toys.
Do you have to use anal sex toys? Of course not. I highly recommend it because with something like anal beads, one end has very small beads that gradually get larger in size. This will help the receiver understand receiving pleasure from insertion and will feel very comfortable because the beads will slowly get larger, thus slowly stretching the anus. This is a great way to prepare for anal sex because they will be highly turned on, have a lubed-up anus, and slightly stretched from anal beads. You would then be fully ready to receive anal sex.
Another way to learn how to have anal sex is branching into different anal sex toys. For example, a butt plug can be a great way to prepare oneself for anal sex. You can use it with your partner or by yourself, but experiment with the intense pleasure it can bring through anal stimulation. Make sure to start small and use lots of lube. Go slow and before you insert it, remember to become completely relaxed to keep the anus muscles loose.
The key to knowing how to have anal sex is training your body to take things in the anus for pleasure. Start small and work your way up, if you feel discomfort stop and try a smaller butt plug or anal bead. Do not jump right into anal sex or you may be sorely disappointed.
Once you do partake in anal sex, go slowly to start. Again, communicate that with your partner ahead of time and during the sexual intercourse. Even if your monogamous, a condom is probably a good idea. It will prevent bacteria from the bowels spreading anywhere. Go with a thicker water-based lube since oil-based lubes will likely tear or break the condom.
Just remember to relax your PC muscles as much as possible, the head of the penis will feel the most uncomfortable because it is the widest part of the penis. Once the tip is in, you are past the most difficult part and congrats on your anal sex venture!
Anal Sex Position:
If you are wondering how to have anal sex in the position that hurts the least, start out on your stomach. It is highly recommended for beginners to start on their stomach or in a spooning type position. The penetrator will have easy access to your anus and you’re able to relax the PC muscles the best. Another recommended beginner anal sex position is with the receiver on top. This allows you to make the decisions on depth and speed according to how comfortable you feel. Just remember switching positions fast or trying to go to fast, to soon, will lead to discomfort and possible injury. Don’t worry about disappointing your partner by going slow to start, I’m sure he is plenty happy with what is going on at the moment.
Anal Sex Hygiene
We really didn’t talk about this earlier, and most people don’t like knowing the facts behind the hygiene with anal sex. However, we believe it is important to be honest and upfront about the steps that should be taken to have anal sex in a proper clean environment.
Anal sex has this stereotype of being dirty and gross, which is far from the truth. But if you want to know how to have anal sex in the cleanest way possible, the receiver should try having a bowel movement then shower beforehand. Use warm water and soap to clean the anus area. The anus and lower part of the rectum actually have very little fecal matter in them. Thus, it will most likely not be nearly as dirty as you would expect.
Once you’re done, just use some warm water for a quick rinse but its actually not necessary. Your partner should not go from vaginal sex to anal sex, back to vaginal as the anus has bacteria specific to that cavity of your body. Make sure he wipes down anything that was in your butt with a baby wipe before inserting into your vagina.
Anal Sex Conclusion
The fact that 46% of women between the ages of 20-24 have tried anal sex means it not this taboo forbidden experience like people make out to be. A lot of couples are trying it and for good reason, it can bring high intensity orgasms to both the giver and the receiver. If you try it and its not for you, don’t keep trying it thinking it will get better with time, or to keep your partner happy. If you don’t like it, stop doing it. It really is that simple.
Make sure to stay hygienic throughout the process and start with anal play before working your way up to anal sex. Remember it can always be done in private by yourself with a finger or sex toy before doing it with a partner. Use lots of lube on anything you put in your butt and keep the communication open with your partner. Anal sex and anal play can bring massive amounts of pleasure if done the right way. If you decide to give it a go, more power to you!
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