Sex Tips & Advice

How to Masturbate for Women!


By Lee & Jessica, Owners of DiskretAdultLife, Oct. 7th, 2018

If you have a vagina, the odds you masturbate a couple times a month is pretty good. To be more precise 60-68% of all women masturbate a few times a year up to monthly. So, weather you do it daily or yearly, you probably want to know how to masturbate the right way. Like looking up a new diet plan, you get flooded with thousands of ideas, products, and everyone is an expert in the field. Same goes with understanding the proper technique on how to masturbate.

So, what we did was talk to real doctors and highly respected individuals in the sex industry. Not to mention we have a couple years under our belt as well ????. A lot of articles talk to doctors and renowned experts in the field, but what they lack is the feedback from your average everyday women who masturbate. We talked to average women about how they masturbate, what works best for them, and what they dislike. Through a large sample size, we begin to develop a picture of trends on how to masturbate for the best orgasms. Let us paint that easy 7 step picture for you.

Why Should I Masturbate:

          For some women it is obvious how to masturbate, and why they should masturbate. Because it feels amazing. But believe it or not, that’s not the only benefits to masturbating. Weather you know how to masturbate or not, you can receive serious benefits from it either way.

Just like exercise is a great way to relieve stress and improve your sleep, so is some alone time spent with your vagina. Masturbation is a safe way to feel good, understand your body, and release built up sexual tension. The bottom line is it has a mass amount of benefits and virtually no downsides if you know how to masturbate safely. It might seem like common sense but if something ever feels uncomfortable or painful at any point STOP. Masturbation is about pleasure and if you’re not receiving it, you’re doing it all wrong.girl moaning, sexy, lust

How to Masturbate: The Types:


If you want to know how to masturbate the best way, you must first learn all the different types of masturbation. Not all masturbation is done the same or uses the same techniques. So here is a brief overview of the different types:


When women think of masturbation the first thing that comes to mind is most likely vaginal masturbation. If you want to know how to masturbate vaginally there are a couple different ways. The first and most common way is to use your fingers for stimulation, there is nothing wrong with that. But if you’re looking for a serious orgasm try a sex toy to masturbate vaginally. There are a few different sex toys to stimulate the vagina. Some are straight dildos, vibrators, and g-spot vibrators to name a few…When you orgasm from vaginal penetration, you will feel it stemming from deeper in your body, and your vaginal walls will begin to throb.


            If you want to know how to masturbate clitorally, you have more options. You can use your how to masturbatefingers or a clitoral stimulating sex toy. These vibrators typically use sonic pulse technology which is a fancy way of saying they can create suction and vibration at a rapid pace while sealed over the clit. Clitoral stimulators come with a silicone tip in different sizes to slip over your clit during stimulation. Learning how to masturbate with one of these is easy and can bring intense orgasms in the matter of minute. When you orgasm from clitoral stimulation it is described as a tingly sensation along your skin and in your brain.


Like most forms of masturbation for anal play, you can use your fingers or a sex toy. There are sex toys specific for anal play like anal beads or butt plugs. When you learn how to masturbate with anal play it really comes down to stimulation of two “ring” shaped muscles that are just inside your anus. You will receive loads of pleasure by stimulating these muscles as your finger or sex toy slides through them, stretching and contracting them. Right before you orgasm from anal play, you may feel an intense need to pee- only the contractions are around your anal sphincter.

Dual Penetration:

            A lot of customers ask how to masturbate with both their vagina and anus. It becomes a bit more complex at this point. Make sure you fully understand your body and how it responds to both anal stimulation and vaginal stimulation separately, before doing them at the same time. You can use a wide variety of sex toys, or your hand and a sex toy, or both hands. The possibilities are endless. This requires experience in knowing which sex toys you feel most comfortable with. It was recommended by most women to start with stimulating the clitoris and vagina at the same time before moving into anal and vaginal stimulation at the same time.

How to Masturbate for Women:

Every woman has their own ritual when it comes to masturbating. But most wonder if they are doing it the best way? If you want to know how to masturbate the best way, some personal preferences will have to be substituted in, however this will guide you through the process that leads to the most frequent and powerful orgasms:

  • Set the Mood:

It might sound lame, but it can make a huge impact on helping your body relax and clearing your head. Setting the mood is important when understanding how to masturbate. You can light candles, dim the lights and lay back on your favorite pillow. But setting the mood might be more than the obvious things. For example, make sure the door is locked and you have your privacy, have the babysitter take the kids out, and turn your phone off. These are all part of setting the mood most women don’t think of but leave huge areas for distraction while masturbating.


  • Get the Lube:

Yes, Diskret sells lube, but it’s not important if you use ours, or coconut oil from your kitchenpersonal lubricant water based. What is important is that you use something. Not using lube can leave you dry, in discomfort and make it much more difficult to achieve orgasm. There are two main types of lube, water-based lube, and oil-based lube. Keep one thing in mind, oil-based lubes do not mix with silicone sex toys. The oil-based lube can break these silicone sex toys down over extended use. However, oil-based lube are great in water environments and last much longer. So, if you want to masturbate in the shower or tub, grab a glass, steel, or crystal sex toy and the oil-based lube. Water-based lube is safe with all types of material but will wash off quickly and not last quite as long.

  • Relax Your Mind and Body

When understanding how to masturbate for the most pleasure, you must learn to relax your mind and body. Everyone does this differently, and we are not going to say you must relax a specific way. Whatever works best for you, only you know. This might be getting the kids out of the house, watching a movie, having a fire, a glass of wine, soft music, a warm bath, candles, reading a book, yoga, or exercise. Only you know what helps you relax the best. Sometimes stimulating the mind and relaxing can overlap. Perhaps you put a romantic movie on that helps relax you and gets you in the mood for stimulation.

  • Stimulate the Mind:

The best way to stimulate the mind is letting it wander. Think of a sexy situation you had in the past, or fantasies about sexy situations that turn you on. If you need help letting your mind wander, try watching porn to start. Most porn sites have a female friendly category if you are not ready for something extreme.

Remember while stimulating your mind and stimulating yourself, orgasm is not the ultimate goal. Of course, an orgasm is a total bonus and a great stopping point, but if you put too much emphasis on it, it can become a mental block. At that point focusing on it only harms you from getting it. Instead, lay back and relax. Just enjoy the pleasure and if you get an orgasm great, if not it’s okay you are still receiving loads of pleasure and giving your body and mind a break from the daily grind.

  • Take Your Time:

Once of the most important things when learning how to masturbate, is taking your time. Do not rush it, don’t skip the foreplay, and don’t skip setting the mood. These are all things that take time and all the details count.

When you are in the process of masturbating, start slow. The best way to orgasm is to build the pressure and stimulation over time. Nice easy slow rhythmic movements in and out will help build the anticipation. When you want more, slowly crank up the speed and add other forms like clitoral or anal play to finish off.

  • Touch Yourself Everywhere Else

I know feeling up your genitals feels amazing. But don’t ignore other parts of your body that deserves attention too. All to often when women start understanding how to masturbate, they leave out important aspects. Don’t forget about your inner thighs, nipples, neck, ear lobes, and butt. You can grab, squeeze, pinch, and caress these areas to build the sexual anticipation.

  • Grab the Sex Toyhow to masturbate

Once you are in the zone and completely turned on by using your hand, whip out the trusty old sex toy! Use a dildo, a vibrator, butt plug, or anal beads to really finish strong. Don’t use them dry, even if you are turned on and plenty wet, a little lube never hurt anyone. Solo masturbation is great, but if you have a partner, try masturbating in front of them. This can be a huge turn on for some couples, don’t let them touch, just watch you use that sex toy. Maybe after a little while you can hand it to them, so they can use it on you. The possibilities really are all endless, and all are pleasure packed!

How to Masturbate Wrap-Up:

         glass thunder beads, anal beads, black twist When learning how to masturbate, just start slow. Pay attention to all the details. Your body will develop and express how it will respond to specific things. Maybe you don’t like clitoral stimulation but really like vaginal penetration or vice versa. Everybody is unique, and you need to slowly experiment different avenues until you become experienced in exactly what your body craves and when. You can then communicate this to your partner in bed for an extremely successful sex life.

Masturbation is good for you and nothing to be ashamed of. Take time to play around, explore yourself and what makes you feel good. A sex toy is a tool every woman should experience at least once and should be something even brought into a relationship. Just follow the 7 simple steps above and happy touching yourself!


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