By Jessica & Lee Owners Of DiskretAdultLife, Nov. 8th, 2018
We need to talk about prostate massages, why you need to try it, why your going to love it, and exactly how to do it for the most pleasure! Now this guide is typically for women or men looking to massage their mans prostate to give him extreme pleasure, but if you’re a guy and adventurous enough to try it on yourself, more power to you!
A p-spot induced orgasm has said to be 33% more powerful than a normal male orgasm. So how does one give a prostate massage to bring a male to orgasm? What risks are involved, who should try it, and what is the easiest way to bring the most pleasure? We use research and real testimonies to answer all your questions and more. So, follow us down this mysterious and pleasurable road of prostate massages!
Prostate Massage 101:
Many people enjoy anal pleasure, and anal stimulation regardless of gender and sexual orientation. That’s because the anus is packed with nerve endings that are highly receptive to the touch, and rarely get touched… what a shame! That is where prostate massages come into play. Anal stimulation can be pleasurable to both men and women, but if you have a prostate it can be take anal stimulation to a whole new level.
What is the prostate gland:
First, we should start off with explaining exactly what the prostate gland is and where to find it. The prostate, often referred to as the p-spot, is a gland within the male sexual organs. Its located about 2-3 inches inside the males anus and is a mass gathering of nerve endings.
Methods of Giving a Prostate Massage:
There are two main ways to stimulate the prostate: direct and indirect. Indirect methods include applying pressure, rubbing, and caressing the perineum. Anal penetration is still actually considered indirect method, the only direct method is through the penis urethra, and requires special sex toys.
For beginners, don’t focus so much on hitting the P-spot. Focus more on giving your partner pleasure through anal play and prostate massages. Anal play without stimulating the prostate is still extremely pleasurable.
Communication During a Prostate Massage:
Remember like any sexual experience, especially first-timers of prostate massages, communication is a must! A simple check of “how’s that feel?” or “is this speed good?” can make all the difference. The receiver should speak up as well, use your hand to guide your partner and communicate if it’s too rough, or too fast. After all, a prostate massage is about giving pleasure, it should feel like a prostate exam by your doctor!
Relax the Mind and Body Before a Prostate Massage:
Its important you can fully relax yourself, this will help relax the anus muscles and allow the fingering to feel more pleasurable and natural. You might want to start with a bowel movement a few hours before the prostate massage. Follow it with a nice long hot shower. Rinse your anus with water and antibacterial soap. This will give you ease of mind later that your clean down there.
Finally, crawl into bed and relax your body and mind. Watch a romantic movie, play some soft music, light some candles… you get the idea. It might sound “corny” but not being calm will kill the mood. Make sure you are comfortable and within arms reach of your favorite lube.
Prostate Massage: The Giver
If your planning on giving your man a prostate massage, there are a couple basic steps to make it much more pleasurable for him. The first thing is making sure your nails are trimmed and your not wearing any rings or jewelry as it could cause pain during insertion. The anus lining is slightly more delicate than the vagina and requires a little more care during insertion and fingering.
You will want to use a latex glove (if both of you are not allergic) or make sure you don’t have any cuts or open wounds on your fingers. The anus is not the most bacteria free spot and you don’t want that getting in your wounds. If you’re not comfortable with a latex glove, you could always use a condom in place instead.
The best type of lube to use is a water-based lube. This is because the more sensitive anus may react with an oil-based lube. Not always the case, but for the first few times you might want to play it safe with the water-based lube. Things to keep in mind are that a water-based lube will absorb into your skin faster and you might need to reapply after a little anal play. For any prostate massage, lube is a must! Your anus does not create its own lubricate like the vagina when turned on!
Prostate Massage: The Receiver
As stated above, the receiver’s main job before a prostate massage is to stay calm and relaxed. Ideally, they would have emptied their bowels and taken a shower ahead of time. Remember your waste really is not stored in the lower part of your anus 1-5” so you really shouldn’t have to worry about your partner touching any waste or experience waste removal during the prostate massage. So that’s a relief! Some men will experience a sensation to pee during a prostate massage. Don’t worry, this is common, if you want to take a pee break before you start it will help ease the mind.
Prostate Massage Positioning
There are a few main positions for a prostate massage that will be the most comfortable for both the giver and the receiver:
This is quite a simple position… anal play is stimulating enough, no need for some crazy wild positions to start. Lay in bed, on your side. Whichever side you’re laying on, pull the knee of your upper leg (the one on top) up toward your chest. This makes it easy to insert the sex toy, finger or whatever into your rectum.
The next position is quite simple as well. Lay flat on your back and pull your feet toward your butt. With your knees raised and spread apart, it provides easy access to the rectum.
Another popular position is on all fours. This gives you or the receiver full access to the rectum for anal stimulation. This is also an amazing way to get a hand job with a prostate massage at the same time. Leading a man into a blended orgasm that will absolutely blow his mind!
Prostate Massage Warm up:
Make sure the finger is lubed up really well along with the anus. Then slowly massage and work the area around the anus. This should be very gentle to start. Then work your way over the anus and apply pulsing pressure but don’t actually insert. STOP, check in with your partner and make sure he is good to continue farther.
If they are, you can increase the pressure you apply while pulsing your finger on the center and rim of his anus. Continue to ramp up the pressure until you begin to get shallow insertion into his rectum. Spend time stimulating like this until your partner is practically begging you to dive deeper.
Massaging the Prostate:
You are then ready to insert the finger 1-3” in and you will feel the prostate. The prostate will feel a bit like a walnut, its raised, firm area which is more textured than the surrounding tissue. To give a proper prostate massage you will need to locate it, similar to a g-spot, the p-spot is located internally on the front wall. Check in with your partner, if they feel a pleasurable spot or a spot that gives them that need to pee sensation. Although it might be a bit odd, that’s a good sign for you have found it.
Once you find it, massage the prostate with your fingertips to stroke the area as you would a g-spot. Experiment with different pressures and strokes, as all men are different you will need to communicate to find out what feels best for him.
Prostate Massage: Sex Toys
Once he feels comfortable with a finger, you should really blow his mind with an anal sex toy. This will take your anal play to a whole new level. Not only are anal sex toys designed to conform to his rectum, they are designed to stimulate the p-spot and vibrate for extra pleasure. Something that is difficult to do with just your finger. It might be a bit uncomfortable at first, since most anal sex toys are larger than a finger, and are typically flared with “bulb” that is required to be inserted.
However, the tapped design allows you to relax once the butt plug is in and it will feel much more comfortable at this point. Just remember if the pain is to much while trying to get it in, just stop and try again another time, or go with a smaller anal toy.
Prostate Massage: Butt Plugs
Butt plugs are a great way to enjoy anal play after a prostate massage. You can learn everything you need to know on butt plugs here. Butt plugs are designed to be inserted once and stay in for up to a couple hours. They bring intense pleasure and can even be worn during penetrative sex.
Prostate Massage: Anal Beads
Anal Beads are another great anal sex toy that are slightly different than butt plugs. You can read everything about anal beads here. Anal beads are designed to be pulled and pushed in your anus. As the beads roll across your anus muscles they provide intense pleasure. These are also a great way to ramp up your anal play after a prostate massage.
Prostate Massage Wrap Up:
The main things to keep in mind before giving or receiving a prostate massage are very important: You must communicate with your partner, slight discomfort is common with beginners but you should never feel pain or see blood at any point. If you do, stop immediately. You should always use lots of water-based lube and remain completely relaxed throughout the entire prostate massage. If you don’t receive a prostate massage orgasm at first, that’s okay! It may take you many tries to work your way up to this sensation.
Once you feel comfortable with the prostate massage from a finger, you can always ramp things up with an anal sex toy. You can try a butt plug, and wear it throughout a sexual experience, or use anal beads. Both bring immense anal stimulation. Just remember, anal pleasure is not limited to any man, women, gay, straight, or any LGBTQQ for that matter. Anyone and everyone has an anus to be stimulated and if you haven’t done so yet, its highly recommended you give it a go!
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